Dictionary.com I visit, to check the meaning of one of the innumerous words which I was ignoramous of. Skimming through the page, I see the 'happy' word and ignore it, not that I tried to be a coxcomb here but only because I knew the meaning of it. Obviously, who wouldn't. Happily I skip the happy word, forget about it and get engrossed in my other work, not that it was important, just browse on the net, try to look for something new n exciting. The velocity of my thoughts increases and I board a flight of memories from the Melbourne airport to the Hyderabad one, I keep cruising smoothly in a jocund fashion way years back. My mom making the best biryani for me, my chachu teasing me, dad teaching me the best things in life, or simply fighting with my sweetest bro, being fortunate enough to meet a new friend in life, or be it the first time I saw aryan my fren's son, how cute was he, they all brought smiles to me, more smiles than before now that I am miles away. Happiness is what we all strive for.... all time, all moments in life. I want to be happy as well. Absolute dependence on what I would define happiness as. Do I accept the universally known or ubiquitously accepted definition of happiness or just create my own? Yes, I guess we all do that, customize it in our own peculiar ways and then start a search for it, as though it was a keyword on a search engine and you get results. Yes, today if you do enter it as a keyword, you will get results. Are they relevant to you? As a child, I wanted all toys, chocolates and ice creams for myself and I was happy....Scoring in math made my happy, a nice beautiful dress my mom would get for me made me happy..... being with my frenz n family made me happy...... being around new places made me happy......Birthday treats and being with my big family made me happy. It was as gleeful, as joyous, as exultant as euphoric(bloomingeuphoria as my blog name, clik clik.....), as amused, basically as happy I could be. As I grew my definition of happiness kept changing. Its just that I start a day, a day full of activities, unrelenting, some jovial moments and the mundane routine....Was it not the happiness but the things from which I was seeking happiness were changing constantly? This was so true. Not that it was inscrutable all this while to me, but its just that point of self realization that had to take a revolt inside me and I started jiving in the inner me. I wanted that gratification where I could find satisfaction that I could get in doing something. Not that I did not get it in when I was working, when I was staying with my family, not that it did not happen when I wanted to study and made it.... Nor when I am here in Melbourne around..... But still, there is something that I so much want to do, somewhere that I want to go, which could make me so happy that I can give that sense of happiness to others, so that they smile n I smile..... Let it not be objectively measurable I say to myself. No homilies here, but just a simple and an honest attempt of finding my path of happiness or satisfaction in life. I wonder what elements are they that make up the correct compound of happiness or a catalyst that I am missing in myself to balance that equilibrium of happiness. My hunt is still on for the essence of my life....
2 comments:
How true. Melbourne leaves me feeling the same way. Nice work.
I like this post a lot. Someone once told me that joy is a choice. We choose to be happy - despite our circumstances. But perhaps what you're actually looking for is fulfillment. And as we go higher up Maslow's Needs Hierarchy, I think we finally achieve fulfillment by giving back.
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